I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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