Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
