Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Randomize
