Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
