oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
