There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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