Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Randomize
