he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
