I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Randomize
