I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
