i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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