I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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