I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize