I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
