It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
