That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Randomize
