So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
