u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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