I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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