so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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