His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
