Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
the day after is always just damage control
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
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