All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
