Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
