I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
you win again, gameday.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
