So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
