did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize