I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
