Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
My vagina just recognized that song.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
