The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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