If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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