It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
