Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Is Oprah even human
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
