We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
