If i come over, it means nothing
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
