you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
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