you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
