SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
