ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
