she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
