drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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