the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
