What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
