im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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