Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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