i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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