why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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