id be glad to
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
