then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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