Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
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