yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
